the listenerd

optimized for maximum incontinence

Month: October, 2011

Video: A commercial for Field Notes

I have a lot of Field Notes. I need a lot of Field Notes.

Links for October 12, 2011: The Phenomenology of Desire

*Real headlines: Family Lost in Massachusetts Corn Maze Calls 911 for Help. They were only 25 feet from the exit. Don’t ever read the transcripts of this. Ever. Similarly (not really?), the movie Drive inspired a man to throw a hot dog at Tiger Woods. I just report this shit. Then cry about it. Then cry about the crying.

*Inventions: The Keaton Music Typewriter is fairly amazing. And my recent analog yearnings are totally driving me toward it. Speaking of analog yearnings, Kottke posted this today, a link to a tumblr called Fuck Yeah Made in USA. (My “analog yearnings” were directed at the tumblr, not Kottke.) [notcot]

*Art: You’re telling me that there’s a Batman musical with music by Meat Loaf? And that Meat Loaf is two words? Like, there’s a separate surname? I call bullshit.

*Vizzie: On this map, the black areas represent users of Facebook. The gold areas represent non-users. I am like a single speck of gold shining in an all-swallowing ocean of black. [via heckadecimal]

*Twitter: I recommend that everyone follow Fake Pew Research. Like, I mean, this one? Also, Neko Case, who claims to be a man, but, whatever she is, is excellent. (A little heavy on the animal shelters…) Also, follow @thewuzzles, who has been doing some INCREDIBLE work with TGI Friday’s lately.

*Local: If you like poetry, the ABSURDIST poet James Tate will be reading at the Walker tomorrow night! For free! There will also be a webcast, I guess? I recommend going or reading some Tate. Here’s a little: “People in glass elevators shouldn’t carry snow shovels.” (I agree.)

*Cycling: This is wonderful? The Speed Vest is an item of clothing that indicates a cyclist’s speed on the back. I could use one of these for running, but instead of my speed, it would simply say what I had just eaten. (E.g. “Some weird salmon meal.”)

*Today’s links: F.

Links for October 11, 2011: Tear the reaper

*This Indian Life: This is the second time I’ve linked to Caravan magazine in the past week! And I don’t even read magazines! Even/especially Caravan! Read about how the voice of the Delhi metro (“Mind the gap,” etc.) first experienced the train. Here’s what a (regular, non “women’s”) Delhi metro car looks like.

*Recommendations: If you want to read the work of someone who writes well, I suggest that you find Mark Lisanti’s various web presences and follow them. To wit: The Types of People You Meet at an Introductory Home Brewing Class. (I feel like it’s weird that neither beards nor bicycles were mentioned.)

*Clothing: This anecdote about how and why Steve Jobs came to wear black turtlenecks and 501 jeans REALLY struck a cord with me. I feel like I’m one PERFECT long-sleeved shirt away from having a uniform I could commit to. (SUGGESTIONS WELCOMED.) For other men of civilian uniform, see Albert Einstein and Scott Seekins.

*Cunning stunts: Based on the recommendation of Stephen Metcalf from Slate’s Culture Gabfest, which is somehow affiliated with the universally-loathed-for-its-kneejerk-contrarian-headlines, I listened to the Fresh Air podcast wherein Terry Gross interviews legendary Hollywood stuntman Hal Needham. A good-old-boy and a great listen. (I will note that I could not fully enjoy the podcast due to the fact that I was jogging at the time. Which I hate.)

*Video: Joey Chestnut speed eats chili. Two gallons. Six minutes. This reminds me of the time I went jogging after eating some sort of weird salmon meal. (Today.)

*Essay: How I Started Running. Good read. I have recently started running and can’t decide whether I loathe myself more for having taken up the sport or for starting to like it. Or for having run immediately after eating a strange dinner. (Earlier this evening.)

*Basketball: Quite a while ago, I wrote about a photo of Dirk Nowitzki. And Inglourious Basterds. Trust me. Go with it. Go with it.

*Today’s links: F-.

Video: Some sort of stag takes out a guy on a mountain bike

Is this footage even real? The guy doing the filming sounds SUSPICIOUSLY Canadian.

Links for October 10, 2011: Neurotypicality be damned

*For rent: The world’s largest shopping mall, the New South China Mall, currently has a 2% occupancy rate. (Maybe this is an opportunity for an Occupy The World’s Largest Shopping Mall movement? Need + Need = Virtuous Circle? Of Need? Let’s do this.)

*Games: Someone should start a game that allows people to bet on who will make the next egregious business misstep, Netflix or Groupon. A Futures Failures Market.

*Photos: The daily Occupy Wall Street photo: Kanye West (not nude).

*Money: Incomes in the U.S. have fallen more since the recession “ended” than they did during the recession. Workers are in a vice.

*Midgets: Some people who have made a bunch of recipes for foods from the “Game of Thrones” books have scored themselves a cookbook deal. [coudal]

*Animations: I normally hate Slate’s manipulative, knee-jerk contrarian headlines, and hence link infrequently to that site. However, the animation of the 2012 Republican campaign as a horse race is very good. Also, after hearing about how Slate’s Culture Gabfest podcast was very good for a LONG time, I finally allowed myself to listen to it. And it’s very good. Ugh.

*Music: First of all, I did not know that Toby Keith had a song called “Red Solo Cup.” Second of all, I did not know that the red solo cup is currently being redesigned. FACTS.


*Please note: Neurotypicality be damned. Can anyone tell me what a caddis fly pupa looks like?

*Today’s links: F.

Video: The Ira Glass Sex Tape

Links for October 9, 2011: Blow up your TV

*Games: If you have the chance, go play Plink with someone you know, or even a stranger. It’s an interactive multiplayer music game by Dinah Moe. And it was strangely fun.

*Savings: A plastic surgeon in Florida is allowing his clients to store fat liposuctioned from their bodies so that they can use it later (fat is often injected into one’s face to fight wrinkles or used to augment one’s breasts). Personally, I am happy to self-store my own fat. In my ass, face and breasts.

*Web: You can follow the Occupy Wall Street movement online here, if you like. It’s a Dave Winer thing.

*Toys: I wrote a listicle about Mr. Potato Head.

*Topography: Read The Grand Map in the Paris Review. “This happens to be how many of us enter the great map. One night, you locate a distant childhood intersection. You leave the street map and enter the scene, passing seamlessly from map to territory.” On a side note, if you’re ever backed into a corner at work, use that old “map vs. territory” saw to obfuscate the issue and imply that your opponent lacks perspective on the question at hand. Then move on quickly and excuse yourself from the discussion entirely. Works like a charm.

*Aging: Rob Walker writes about wear and tear‘s place in the tech world, and maybe muses about whether it should be more digitally apparent? Have I mentioned lately that the skin around my eyes looks like a brown paper bag that has been crunched and uncrunched for the lifetime of one thousand wraiths. (That just flowed out of me and I went with it.)

*Reportage: Caravan magazine profiles Das Racist.

*Note: Got rid of my television today.

*Today’s links: F.

Links for October 8, 2011: The care and feeding of isolationism

*Ads: Check out Audi’s interactive YouTube driving videogame. If you are in the market for a mid-high end automobile. Or like ads.

*Home: The thing I found funniest about this very good Lauren Collins article about IKEA is the description of the company’s founder’s home town: “Älmhult lies halfway between the North Sea and the Baltic Sea, in Småland, a remote region of barren, rocky flatland. Smålanders are known, more or less, as the Scots of Sweden. Faced with the area’s harsh winters and lack of arable soil, many of them immigrated to Minnesota in the nineteenth century.” Right between the eyes: Scot, Swedish, Minnesota, lack of arable soil.

*Photos: A nude Gaius Baltar, who has apparently joined the Occupy Wall Street movement.

*Science: I highly recommend that you look at these sponge human body sculptures by Etienne Gros. One is of a butt.

*Hypermediated: Barry Ritholtz pull-quotes Nicholas Thompson wondering who will be the next Steve Jobs in the New Yorker: “[Mark Zuckerberg] gives every indication of being the next Bill Gates: a smart dude who has one great idea at the right time, builds a monopoly, and then keeps it by releasing stuff that’s good enough but never great.”

*Slides: This slideshow of cargo bikes reminds me that I would like to cut up a Burley and load it up with like half a dozen sheets of plywood. Or maybe paving stones. (For what it’s worth, you see more radically weird ones around here weekly.)

*Today’s links: F.

Video: Bon Iver after party video (soundtrack by Poliça)

Can you tell I have something on the brain? Music is “Dark Star.”

When did they start making videos for after parties?

Links for October 7, 2011: Inspirational “content” to be “consumed”

*Blogs: For a site entirely about donkeys, this blog sure has a stupid name. (Anything other than “That Ass” is a stupid name in this situation.)

*Video: Designer Mike Thompson has invented a WiFi dowsing rod. What I think could be interesting is a subject-agnostic dowsing rod with built-in location sensitive software and either a voice input or a small keyboard, so you could change what you wanted to dowse depending on your mood and needs. For instance, a rest room. Or a drink. (Not necessarily in that order.) [notcot]

*Digits: You had me at 16-fingered robot, 16-fingered robot (or spokesperson for said). I should mention that this robot washes your hair. Remind me to someday tell you about the head massage I long ago received in China from a young lady who had just barely finished picking her nose. It’s utterly disgusting.

*Local: For anyone who has ever driven up Interstate 35, north of the Twin Cities, I present you with this image. (Link contains 1990s pop culture innuendo and grainy, tilted photograph.)

*Obits: My brilliant former colleague Jeff Yang wrote about “The Zen of Steve Jobs” in his new column for the Wall Street Journal, Tao Jones. I found this Onion piece insightful, as well. Link contains the F word. (You know; fuck.)

*Author’s note: You have my solemn promise that I will never, on this blog, post any “content” that I intend for people to “consume.” That would be rude.

*Today’s links: F. Give me one month to get back into fighting trim. One month. (Also, I should lose about 15 pounds.)

Video: Television Commercial

Video: Poliça does “Form” at the Kitty Kat Klub in Minneapolis

1) Never use a cedilla in your band name.

2) HOW do I get my hands on “Wandering Star”?

3) Here’s their website.

4) Am I back? I don’t know.