the listenerd

optimized for maximum incontinence

Tag: fergie

NEWS EVENT: Kings of Leon’s bassist’s mouth shit in by a bird

Last night’s Kings of Leon concert in St. Louis ended after only three songs when a bird shit in Jared Followill’s mouth. The bird was said to have been a pigeon and Jared Followill is said to be the bassist of this band, who you may know for singing “Sex on Fire.”

This incident will most probably be incorporated into listenerd headlines for years to come, much the same as when The Dave Matthews Band’s tour bus dumped human waste on an unsuspecting passerby or The Black Eyed Peas’ Fergie urinated herself on stage.

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Links for 1.11.08: New Yorker on Bon Iver, Bono in the Times, gamers in Poetry, me home…

*Report: I stepped away for a bit, so apologies if any of this is old news.

*Articles: The most enjoyable read waiting for me upon my return from the vast halls of hell was this piece by Sasha Frere-Jones in the New Yorker about Bon Iver (aka Justin Vernon). In it, Frere-Jones writes “The songs from “For Emma,” which Vernon once described as merely “demos” to his friends, feel complete, now that he has had more than a year to play them live.”

Frere-Jones goes on to interview Vernon for a site video, and mentions the new Bon Iver EP, “Blood Bank” in a blog post.

*Articles: The least enjoyable read upon my return from the vast halls of hell was this article by Bono, which appeared on the op-ed page of the New York Times. Because it’s Bono. Also, because “Glasses clinking clicking, clashing crashing in Gaelic revelry: swinging doors, sweethearts falling in and out of the season’s blessings, family feuds subsumed or resumed.”

*Poetry: From “The First Line is the Deepest” by Kim Addonizio in Poetry

“Why does one month have to be the cruelest,
can’t they all be equally cruel? I have seen the best

gamers of your generation, joysticking their mi tanks through
the sewage-filled streets.”

*2008: Hype Machine ran its Music Blog Zeitgeist of 2008 list. MGMT tops the artist list, ahead of Radiohead.

*Nuptials: Fergie got married to that Dude from Las Vegas. Remember when Fergie was the Listenerd familiar? Back when she was performing regularly with the Black Eyed Peas? And becoming incontinent on stage?

*Twitter: Do you want to follow Karl Rove on Twitter? Also, Ray Pruit. (You should know who Ray Pruit is. If you’re old.)

*TV: Look at these pictures of the abandoned soundstage from HBO’s The Wire. While listening to Bon Iver. And being a big, emotional baby. [medialoper]

*Posters: Shepard Fairey issues an Obama Inauguration poster. I’m looking forward to the Obama 100 Days poster and the Obama Bought a Dog poster. Also, $$$$$. [coolhunting]

Links for 11.25.08: Bono’s music store, Forte’s pardon, Obamafy yourself…

*Downloads: Bono is going into the business of selling music with (Red) Wire, a digital download and discovery service. He’ll give a portion of the proceeds to the Global Fund, but he’ll probably be a prick about it.

*Pardon me?: President Bush pardons rapper John Forte, who was in jail on drug charges. Could Dubya be a closet Fugees fan?

*Digital music: Sales for Atlantic Records’ digital music eclipsed sales of their physical music for the same period.

*Nose flutes: If you can’t appreciate a good roundup of nose flute videos, I don’t know what you can appreciate. Though it’s probably some highfalutin’ bullshit. As I will point out in the comments of the linked-to post, however, they have forgotten the unforgettable “Sophie Monk Double-Nose Flute Incident” in their collection.

*Biz: How tethered to Apple is the growth of digital music (the paid kind)? I would just like to point out that wide swaths of the economy are going into the shitter. WIDE swaths. OK?

*Propaganda: The Obamafy plug-in allows you to turn your Photo Booth photos into Shepard Fairey-like propaganda. HOPE. [the duty]

*Black Eyed Peas: Fergie is recording vocals for Slash’s – formerly of a little band called GUNS N’ ROSES – forthcoming album. I feel sort of bad for almost abandoning Fergie content, but she hasn’t peed herself in years. OK?

*Local: Oh, look. Nine Inch Nails is in town, and Trent Reznor is taking pictures of manhole covers!

*Twitter: Shaquille O’Neal has been twittering his thoughts on the Natalie Holloway case. What?

*Personal: Seriously. I’m very tired by the end of the day. OK?

Links for 11.13.08: Jacko signs away Neverland, Live Nation stock drops, Van Damme talk politics…

*Real Estate: Michael Jackson transfers ownership of the Neverland ranch to a company he partly owns. There was a special on MJ several years ago on which he ran around buying huge gold pots and insanely garish statues. It haunts me to this very day.

*Covers: Listen to Swede popper Jens Lekman cover Boyz II Men’s “Water Runs Dry” at stereogum.

*The Markets: Live Nation says that concert ticket sales won’t go down next year. Analysts disagree. Live Nation stocks fall 27%. [licensing plate]

*Children: Apparently, Mates of State is the sole voice of touring bands who are also parents. Also, they have nothing to say that is not parental in nature. EVER. [largehearted boy]

*Behind the scenes: Aziz Ansari takes you behind the scenes of Kanye’s and Rihanna’s “Glow in the Dark” tour. “After the show in Notre Dame, Kroll and I were hanging out in the hotel lobby about to head to bed early to take it easy. I’m reading an op-ed in the New York Times by Paul Krugman. I feel a tap on my shoulder. It’s Paul Krugman.”

*Urination: As you may know, the listenerd is “optimized for maximum incontinence.” With that in mind, I find it necessary to pass on to you the fact that Videogum is running some fan fiction about Hugh Jackman peeing his pants. This may be the biggest news in celebrity incontinence since Fergie wet herself onstage several years ago.

*Interviews: I know you have been waiting almost five years to read a Jean-Claude Van Damme interview. Wait no more. “Who won? Obama?

Links for 9.21.08: Product placement, Replacement news, Lennon’s ire…

*Product placement: I’ve written about Fergie writing a song for Candie’s (don’t think it ever went through, though; they got nervous at the backlash) and Chris Brown surreptitiously making a Wrigley’s jingle into a hit single – here Listening Post covers another aspect of music product placement: simple brand mentions in hip-hop songs – for sale.

*Interview: TV on the Radio’s Tunde Adebimpe talks to the Wall Street Journal. “When “Jump Tomorrow” came out I got an agent and I started going on auditions. And I’d find myself in a room full of people who vaguely looked like me and I’d think, ‘Do I really want to be on a soap opera?'” This is me every day. But instead of the soap opera thing, it’s “in an office.”

*Replacements: Newsday interviews Paul Westerberg: “One day Tommy wants to sue me, the next he wants to jam. I think he’s in the jamming mood this week, but by the time he gets here we might just meet and fight.” This week Rhino Records is doing a big rerelease of The Replacements last four albums. [largehearted boy]

*Etiquette: Upon the occasion of trying to teach his son Sean how to eat steak, John Lennon once became so frustrated and yelled so loudly, the young man required medical aid. “He did wind up yelling at me very, very loudly to the point where he damaged my ear, and I had to go to the hospital.” [huffpo]

*Covers: An all-girl Belgian band covers Radiohead’s “Creep.” For those of you who like to listen to things. [via zeon]

*Toys: The Epidermits is a concept toy, and it is perhaps one of the most frightening toys I have ever seen. Do not click through on the via link unless you are prepared to be scarred or are already so scarred that it won’t matter what you see. Also, keep your children away from your computer until you fully understand your parental position on this item. Thank you. [bb gadgets]

Links for 7.31.08: Kanye’s clothes, Aussie pirates, Rihanna’s outerwear…

*Fashion: Kanye West makes Vanity Fair‘s best-dressed list. Must have been the sunglasses? You know? With the shutters? Hello? Hi.

*Alternative fuels: The New York Times highlights young rockers riding biodiesel busses.

*Hip-hop and hops: ?uestlove’s Air Force 1 shoes.

*Mascots: OK, first listenerd favorite Soulja Boy beefs with Ice T. Then listenerd mascot Fergie agrees to play a prostitute in her feature film debut. And now listenerd emerging artist Rihanna is seen sporting a nipple ring through her see-through shirt. Next up: the listenerd adopts Amy Grant.

*Fashion: The geekini is a Nintendo controller-inspired bikini.

*Travel: If you go to Australia, they may check your gear for pirated music. THAT YOU HAVE STOLEN.

*The internet: The Daily Star points out KissThisGuy, a site for misheard lyrics. (There are few better than “Yellow Ledbetter.”) Because kids used to learn lyrics by reading the CD liners. [fark]

Links for 7.30.08: Fergie’s acting, streaming Palooza, Biggie vs. Mick…

*Faves: Listenerd favorite and Black Eyed Pee siren Fergie will soon take a break from singing about her humps and play a prostitute on the big screen in Nine. [vulture]

*Talk: Interview with Fleet Foxes – ” We’re not trying to pull the wools over anyone’s eyes so if people want to call us hippies that’s totally fine.” [largehearted boy]

*Lollapalooza: AT&T will stream some of the festival live from here. If you are too old to go.

*Pics: Words and photos from the recent Hold Steady thing at First Ave. (Disclosure: I work with the byline dude. He’s tall.)

*The Beat: The Frisky rounds up masturbation songs. For your pleasure. (Wait, wasn’t that Green Day song about this activity? Hello?) [buzzfeed]

*Mashups: Notorious B.I.G. vs. The Rolling Stones = Poppa Was a Rolling Stone. I can’t get a lot of satisfaction out of the way you call me Big Poppa. UH.

*Found: An unreleased recording of the Beatles was recently discovered in a Liverpool attic. Is it weird that I have cited news items on Dylan, the Stones and the Beatles all in the past two days, a couple of them regarding the discovery of previously unreleased materials? At the day job we talk a lot about the emergent age of near-infinite information persistence, but it seems that a marked lengthening of captured data’s life began 50 years ago. Also, I have been getting up at FIVE FUCKING THIRTY IN THE MORNING, MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!

*Local: MFR reminds us all that Minneapolis hip-hop band Atmosphere is the musical guest on CBS’ Late Night with David Letterman tonight.

*Off topic: Jerry Lewis has been carrying a gun in his luggage. And that is not a euphemism. (No idea.) [medialoper]

Links for 7.11.08: Metallica’s spendy album, the Beatles’ iPod, Johnny Cash’s hip-hop…

*Rumors: Word is, there is a Beatles-branded iPod on the way. [getty images]

*Wait: So Metallica is trying to charge $25 per download of its latest album, Death Magnetic? In my opinion: a lot.

*Jennifer Hudson’s new album cover is photoshopped. People. If it were up to me, I would be photoshopped at all times.

*Remixes: Johnny Cash + Snoop Dogg = Johnny Cash Remixed. It comes out on October 14. [p-fork]

*Scientology: Parade interviews Beck: “Right now I’m listening to the sound of Norwegian traffic outside my hotel window.” [indieblogheaven]

*Videogames: Guitar Hero publisher Activision Blizzard (that sounds weird) may be prepping to launch an iTunes rival music store.

*Movies: Is there a chance that there will be a Deadwood movie after all? It may not speak well of me, but Al Swearengen is my single favorite TV character ever. Cocksucker.

*Bump news: 9 months later (well, almost), and Fergie STILL might be pregnant…

*Bikinis: Perhaps you would like to see Carrie Underwood, the singer of “Jesus, Take the Wheel” in one. (Let me know if it’s any good. Personally, I’m too chaste to click through.)

*Luxury: Louis Vuitton sweatbands – Approved by hip-hop artist The Game! Personally, I like to do my sweating in my underwear. (No idea.)

Links for 5.30.08: A Blu-ray record, Rihanna’s “Distrubia,” The Dead’s kicks…

*From Grooveshark: TinySong is a a tinyurl for songs. HUH!

*Kanye West comments on all these “Flashing Lights” videos coming out (there are three versions so far): Two of them were leaked! [universal]

*The world’s first Blu-ray record has been released. Yes, it’s by Trondheimsolistene! A Norwegian orchestra. I’ll be honest. I didn’t know about Trondheimsolistene before this either.

*Converse = aggressive: Grateful Dead kicks (with shoes from The Beatles and The Doors on the way, as well). Also, Jack Purcells are available at J. Crew now. I take a lot of shit for this.

*The listenerd’s Fergie-replacement-diva Rihanna has a new song out: “Disturbia.” Farewell, Fergie. [vulture]

*Prince and Radiohead differ as to whether Prince’s Coachella cover of “Creep” should be allowed up on YouTube.

Video: Fergie on the Today Show

Vodpod videos no longer available. from videogum.com posted with vodpod

Video collection: the best cartoon / music mashups

From urlesque’s Top Ten list. They put Family Guy’s “Crank That” on top, but I don’t think it holds a candle to the Little Mermaid’s “Fergalicious.”

Links for 4.27.08: Urban mining, Prince’s mustache, the RIAA’s conspiracy?

*BusinessWeek covers one woman’s fight against the RIAA. She’s being sued for music piracy, but is going after the RIAA for conspiracy. [mediaeater]

*JadedInsider on Prince’s Coachella performance yesterday: “Solid performances from Portishead, Death Cab For Cutie, and MGMT kept the faith, all of which were dwarfed by the phenomenon that is Prince. His instrumental prowess, songwriting depth, and immaculately well groomed hair and mustache were on full display in abundance before the tens of thousands of listeners assembled at the Main Stage.”

*In filesharing news: Limewire falling, uTorrent rising.

*Rihanna has a new video, for “Take a Bow.” If you hadn’t heard, Rihanna is the listenerd’s new Fergie.

*New York Noise TV: Expect a lot of day glow. [mediation]

*It’s fascinating to watch the code around the word “urban” shift. Urban ____ing. Today: Urban mining.

*Photography that pixelizes real-life graffiti. [kanye’s blog]

Links for 4.24.08: Chocolate anniversary, 30 Rock’s uncanny valley, Wii pole dancing…

*Fergie sings the theme for the new “Sex and the City” movie. The Playlist abhors it.

*Minneapolite Tay Zonday is celebrating the one-year (WTF?) anniversary of “Chocolate Rain” with an album of techno remixes (again, WTF?). [urlesque]

*IsMichaelArringtonaDick.com. [Fimoculous]

*Anti-music discovery vs. pro-music discovery [duke listens!]

*Wow. Threadless and Moby are working together to beg people to design Moby t-shirts? [listening post]

*The Rhythmic Desktop BeatBox: Making mad beats from dumb office noises. [neural.it]

*On connecting a Wii to a stripper pole. [adverlab]

*OK: 30 Rock just dropped the concept of “the uncanny valley” on millions of U.S. homes. Thank you.

Video: Fergie sings Heart on American Idol

Sans on-stage urine.

[earsucker]