the listenerd

optimized for maximum incontinence

Tag: nsfw

Links for 2.20.10: 101 Tips for Better Abs

*Mules: Mules come from the sexual union of a male donkey and a female horse. Hinnies are made by mating male horses and female donkeys. And no one likes them. Susan Orlean (who is terrible on Twitter) has written a very compelling story of the recent history and modern-day use of mules. And I recommend it. (Spoiler: Afghanistan and the Amish.)

*Sex: This survey answers the question that’s been on your mind since you read this sentence – what’s the sex life of MIT students like? The Chemistry Department has the largest concentration of virgins. If you’re wondering. [mefi]

*Blogging: It’s been years since I started this blog, but I still have no idea how to blog. However, I thoroughly enjoyed this deliciously meta article on how to write an incendiary blog post. Also, I think I need to work on my headlines.

*Robbery: Waxy does a rundown of decades worth of media scares that focus on innovations that allow savvy burglars to tell when people will be home and when they won’t.

*Sex and advertising: Durex uses words shaped like sex in its latest print campaign. This link is as NSFW as word shapes can be.

*Music: Codeorgan allows you to plug in an URL, then it produces the musical fingerprint of the site. Thelistenerd is lower than I was expecting it to be.

*Rules: If you want to write fiction, never open with weather and never use the word “suddenly.” At least, if you think Elmore Leonard is worth listening to. Ask me sometime to dredge up the story of a busker in an empty train station that I wrote years ago. It is as sure a cure for insomnia as is in existence today. [mefi]

*Existence: There is a dub band called Umberto Echo. Language is destiny. [neural]

*Ab progress: None.

*Today’s links: F.

Links for 12.29.09: I am a sick man. I am a spiteful man.

*Reading: The Awl’s “The End of the 00s” has essays. By people. About things past. Those people include: Joel Johnson (I wrote about being a new dad for a week for his medium-lived Dethroner), Maura Johnston (formerly of Idolator, she hates dropped-crotch trousers), Will Leitch (we were going to do a video interview with him at a conference for my day job for a while, until the video interviewing devices exploded), and Rob Walker (whom I now read less for consumed than for his other projects). And many other people. Ugh. People.

*Lists: Before you read THIS, you should know that if I were forced to either choose a favorite author or be mock-executed, I’d say Dostoyevsky. (In order of likedness: Brothers K, Notes from Underground, Crime and P, The Idiot, The Gambler, The Double.) I should also note that I don’t think the list is particularly accurate. Like, except for a few authors that she nails, it’s offish. UGH.

*Art: Look at these books you don’t even have to read anymore. [notcot]

*Social Media: The track the most Last.fm users wanted hidden from their scrobbles was Lady Gaga’s “Poker Face.” I must say, Lady Gaga has grown on me. Like a skin on a glass of egg nog. Delicious, delicious egg nog. [fimoculous]

*Video: Stereogum has collected the 10 Most NSFW Music Videos of 2009. On a somewhat related note, I used to love Stereogum. I used to wait for new posts (they were written by Scott). I used to read them. I used to read the comments. I used to chuckle at the comments. I thought I should say that. It was a long time ago.

*People: Wikipedia on Andrew W.K. – “Popular memes and subcultural rumours suggest that another person, known as “Steev Mike”, is behind Andrew W.K.’s music.” This reminds me of the theory that it wasn’t William Shakespeare who wrote the works of William Shakespeare, but someone else named William Shakespeare. A theory which, incidentally, I love. [the daily swarm]

*Vinyl: Look! It’s Allen Ginsburg made out of vinyl. I was never much of a Ginsburg fan. Too easy.

*Literature: Abe Books’ Weird Book Room presents such titles as “Tattooed Mountain Women and Spoon Boxes of Daghestan.” Too easy? [harper’s]

*Local: Holy. A VERY skinny Craig Finn, along with Lifter Puller, doing a St. Cloud, Minnesota gig. Forever ago.

*Local blogging: Here’s an interview with Ed Kohler of The Deets about his recent poltical blogging. Also, he’s done some examinations of Twitter noise recently that have been sort of interesting. (Close readers of the ‘nerd may recall that I once wanted to make a qualitative inquiry into local Twitter users’ signal-versus-noise, but was unable to do so due to personal stupidity.)

*Today’s links: F

Links for 7.29.09: Prince, Van Morrison, Phish

*Words: Being a linguistic examination of a Van Morrison rant filled with swear words. Related: Go fuck yourself. [mefi]

*Comics: Sally Forth meets Thomas Pynchon. I met Thomas Pynchon once. And have the aphasia to prove it. [harper’s]

*Local: Was Purple Rain the high-water mark of Twin Cities music? I saw Prince play at the Mill City Music Festival once. Then I got extraordinarily drunk and danced on 1st Avenue. Remind me not to describe that in detail to anyone. Ever. [daily swarm]

*Music: I started a LinkedIn group called Professionals for Clarity, Levity and Brevity once. This Mashable article about music and social media would in no way qualify for inclusion in our holy bible. And I have high tolerance.

*Headlines: Love this headline re: Wired’s Chris Anderson – Chris Anderson Less Intellectually Curious Than George W. Bush [spincity]

*Furniture: Cassette lamps. Where’s the 8-track footstool? See what I did there? Hated myself. Intensely. [coudal]

*TV: I am currently watching a television program that’s telling me that Michael Jackson was addicted to eBay. But I can’t imagine him using a computer with any proficiency. He used IE, right?

Links for 2.19.09: Daniel Johnston on art, Retweeting vs. Favrding and chicken

*Podcast: Still no traction in my quest to convince Iron and Wine’s Sam Beam to record a comedic podcast with me (the listenerd’s first), though I have now figured out my 2nd interview question: “Do you know any jokes?” Doubtless, he will have one that makes use of the homophonic phrase “Mountin’ Party.” DOUBTLESS.

*Interviews: Harvey Pekar interviews Daniel Johnston in Black Book. Holy weirdness. This is like me talking to…Sam Beam. Or something. DJ: “My writing is an absentminded, subconscious kind of thing. I’m lucky if I write a song a week, but I like to try every day. It’s always been that way.”

*Graphics: This flowchart for porno movies is not safe for work at all.

*Social graphs: I recommend looking at the Facebook Nexus. If you are interested in getting your MIND BLOWN about things that probably don’t mean much. I feel bad for the dots that only have me. [the deets]

*Eating: A Flick photo pool called The Fried Chicken Pantheon collects pictures of dining establishments that serve chicken. I am ON RECORD as saying that the Famous Bowl is man’s most incredible creation. [coudal]

*Marketing: What brands do 19 teens and tweens associate with music? You can see the answer to that question, here. MTV! Apple! Facebook! Huh. [ypulse]

*Beards: Can you put 2,000 toothpicks in your beard? OK, how many chopsticks? [urlesque]

*Movies: The Art of the Title Sequence takes a look at the good beginning parts of all kinds of movies, and even offering commentary on them. Here’s 300. [good]

*Twitter: Read this post about “Twitter’s two cultures,” Favrders and Retweeters. I’m neutral in this debate, but retweeters are retarded morons. [fimoculous]

Video: Every curse from every episode of The Sopranos

NSFW. More than 27 minutes.

Vodpod videos no longer available.

What body parts does your favorite musical genre most-often address?

Fleshmap’s awesome visualization offers a cloud-like view of which body parts are most often cited by musical genre. Hip-hop, for instance, is about the ass. Metal? The eyes. Gospel, the hands. [mefi]

Video: “Show Me Your Genitals”

Language and sentiment are not really safe for work.

[twitter]

Video: Ed’s Furry Fucking Guide to Metal [NSFW]

Puppets star in this video, but the language is very metal. Which is to say yelly and swearish.

[metal sucks]

Links for 4.23.08: Music for Oldsters, gay hip-hop, robot orchestra conductors…

*Too funny: GetBack Media focuses on music fans who are 35+, concentrating on American pop culture from 1968-1990. Those were the days? [musicweek]

*More on the Take-Away Shows tip: They Shoot Music, Don’t They?: tiny concerts, for the people. Not a lot of huge names, but check out Shout Out Louds. [psfk]

*Read Cracked’s Top 10 Unintentionally Gay Rap Lyrics: Tupac’s “Ever since you was a pee-wee, down by my knee with a wee-wee.” [the rap up]

*I’m predicting only niche acceptance: The Ouija board guitar. [bb gadgets]

*A robot, in the form of a Honda Asimo, is going to conduct the Detroit Symphony. [listening post]

*Recommended: Finally, the video for “Smell Yo Dick” is available. NSFW. [lots and lots of places]

*Slightly off-topic: Interview with Craigslist’s CEO. Lots of transcript here: Love it.

*If you bought music from MSN Music back in the day, you will probably be screwed as of August 31, 2008. Due to DRM. You were warned. Many, many times. [ars technica]

*If you enjoy data visualization: Read this list. [kottke]

*Happy 60th, Pops!

Links for 12.10.07: Non-news, Imeem’s coup, Pac-Man X-mas +

*OK: WEIRD. The readers of Hypebot (or maybe one particularly vehement reader especially) have nominated the listenerd in the category of Best Music News Blog. For the record, I do not really consider this a music news blog at all, but rather simply an “amalgamation of crap that is interesting to me” blog.

*Social music site Imeem has signed Universal to a contract; now has deals with all four majors. Wow. (More at BusinessWeek. [mashable]

*Culture Bully tries to call the top ten music videos of the year.

*Bono on U2’s next album: “There’s some trance influences.”

On a tangential note, new listenerd readers should note that I hate Bono. [vicarious]

*Stereogum is worth $5M. OK, nice. [idolator]

*How would you like to read an interview about a list of lists? OK. [fimoculous]

*Commercial: If you want to support Pandora, you may perhaps buy their trippy posters for your friends.

*It is by now well known that Fark has tried to copyright NSFW. Those motherfuckers. Oops.

*Local: The A.V. Club interviews Dan Wilson.

*Cracked does good lists these days. The 9 Most Unnecessary Greatest Hits Albums of All Time: Vanilla Ice, Nelson… [mediaor]

*Off topic: The Pac-Man Christmas Tree.

*Not THAT music-related, but I recommend perusing the Esquire Drinks Database. For the sake of your palate. [josh spear]

Video: R. Kelly’s “Real Talk”

R. Kelly continues to shock, enlighten and mystify. Except for the enlighten part. In his latest video for the conversational Trapped in the Closet-esque “Real Talk,” he begins by musing on the nature of profanity (a subject also considered in the listenerd’s links this morning).

There are nearly a dozen quotable lines in this video, which is NSFW, though should probably be watched at least 5 times for true understanding and appreciation to sink in.

[byron crawford]